So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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