Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  grandma shit on top of the toilet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): grandma shit on top of the toilet http://tfl.nu/v03m
  Replies (17) Good night (978) Bad night (5897)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction. http://tfl.nu/bt6f
  Replies (54) Good night (719) Bad night (4297)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable. http://tfl.nu/uirm
  Replies (22) Good night (957) Bad night (3422)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  I'll start drinking again when I know where I am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): I'll start drinking again when I know where I am http://tfl.nu/a7gj
  Replies (24) Good night (4873) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (731): who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you. http://tfl.nu/e0pj
  Replies (39) Good night (5221) Bad night (2253)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers http://tfl.nu/tvan
  Replies (2) Good night (2206) Bad night (632)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz http://tfl.nu/2w6v
  Replies (20) Good night (2956) Bad night (980)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity http://tfl.nu/6n2x
  Replies (2) Good night (944) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out. http://tfl.nu/ejyb
  Replies (4) Good night (819) Bad night (1415)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism. http://tfl.nu/z92b
  Replies (13) Good night (1820) Bad night (826)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted http://tfl.nu/7mo3
  Replies (2) Good night (1545) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra? http://tfl.nu/q2ra
  Replies (4) Good night (538) Bad night (294)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows. http://tfl.nu/xsuo
  Replies (7) Good night (2474) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down http://tfl.nu/70sk
  Replies (2) Good night (268) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance. http://tfl.nu/khcw
  Replies (1) Good night (489) Bad night (248)

Randomize