So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
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There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
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He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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