I just threw up on my dentist
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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