just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I want to fling myself into the sun
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
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