Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
We talked him into tasing himself.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
