I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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