If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
