Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
