I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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