Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
