You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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