you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Randomize