You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
stop calling my apartment porn island.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
