are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
