I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
