Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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