And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
