you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
