Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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