Texts From Last Night

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  (217): View more from Illinois

  she looks like luggage that fell from a plane

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  (217): she looks like luggage that fell from a plane http://tfl.nu/yvwr
  Replies (5) Good night (708) Bad night (2560)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again

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  (404): Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again http://tfl.nu/4z80
  Replies (59) Good night (809) Bad night (3624)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???

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  (407): I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms??? http://tfl.nu/7lb6
  Replies (32) Good night (5441) Bad night (892)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"

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  (905): while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger" http://tfl.nu/ftph
  Replies (20) Good night (4355) Bad night (1176)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts

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  (978): Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts http://tfl.nu/t2mu
  Replies (6) Good night (3126) Bad night (1247)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?

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  (478): First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing? http://tfl.nu/cqnb
  Replies (1) Good night (1556) Bad night (920)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead

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  (347): I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead http://tfl.nu/i3pk
  Replies (7) Good night (1484) Bad night (736)
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  (707): View more from California

  Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.

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  (707): Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand. http://tfl.nu/dp2x
  Replies (6) Good night (1712) Bad night (655)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat

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  (902): They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat http://tfl.nu/tmda
  Replies (3) Good night (881) Bad night (537)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.

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  (561): I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you (860): I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this. http://tfl.nu/r7r6
  Replies (5) Good night (1492) Bad night (557)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.

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  (919): I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career. http://tfl.nu/kw3u
  Replies (14) Good night (2063) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.

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  (775): Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure. http://tfl.nu/5ngb
  Replies (5) Good night (723) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.

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  (301): I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go. http://tfl.nu/3bnd
  Replies (2) Good night (776) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit

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  (610): He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit http://tfl.nu/33or
  Replies (0) Good night (767) Bad night (352)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is

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  (229): I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is http://tfl.nu/c9vw
  Replies (4) Good night (1203) Bad night (318)

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