ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!