And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
