The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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