That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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