Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize