problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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