hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
