Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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