are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
