I wish life had little blips of pornography
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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