How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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