12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize