i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
