i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
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