k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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