i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
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