Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
