week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize