as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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