Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Even my vagina gasped.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize