Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
