I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
