It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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