I am puke
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I would ride that face into the sunset
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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