I'm so fucking centered right now
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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