Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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