try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
