Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize