Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
