dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
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You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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